Been a while...

Hello there, it's been a while since I'd updated anything here.
Dear is in his very sexy pose right in front of the TV, and I am here updating this post.

And he had just asked me to watch a video on his tab where the husband scared the wife with some home made ghost in front of the TV. I swear I would break his bike if that ever happens to me... hiak hiak hiak...

He loves me, that would be something I am more than sure of. I guess if I ever had doubts, I would remember all the points that he had tried and proven to me that he loves me... and of course, I love him too. Forever.

Now... below is my journal from last night :
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6^th July 2013

Another proof that he loves me:

He brought me to Highland Tower. In fact, I couldn’t even see the condominium, even though he kept pointing out where the place was. I had been asking him to bring me there – even though I didn’t really want to go there. I just wanted to know where it is located. We had quite a late dinner earlier at Wichudda Restaurant at Damansara Uptown, and right after that we went straight to the place.

There was a row of houses which were… really creepy looking though. There were neither doors nor window panes, there were only darkness inside – and dear said that the inside must have had some drug addicts. Apart from that creepy-looking area, the houses there were luxurious and might cost up to 6 million, or even more. Dear said that many of the local celebrities stay in that area.

One peculiar part about the place was that there was this dead end where there were three pigs feeding on some stuffs on the ground. We stayed there for a while to look at the pigs and they were just feeding there…

We plan on going to Kuala Gandah tomorrow. Gotta sleep. Good night. 

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And ... today since we woke up late - again, we didn't go to Kuala Gandah. I put out the clothes to dry them, since the sun was shining brightly...

We went to have lunch at the apartment - the lunch was quite late. We got out from the house at about 4 P.M. This apartment food place is like a new place for us to have our meals - even though I still dream about cooking for dear...
Anyway, after that we decided to go to Ulu Yam... we went back home to get some doughnuts from dear's car... and then went off..
On the way to Ulu Yam we stopped by at Batu Caves temple, a tourist's destination in Malaysia, and it was officially my first time there. I snapped about 2 photos - and that was it. Dear didn't bring his bike locks, so we could not leave the bike for long.
I went to feed a monkey - with the doughnut, and since the monkey was big, I was pretty scared, so instead of giving the monkey food gently, I threw the doughnut right at it.. poor thing.

And then, we sped off to Ulu Yam... the place is actually very nice.
The ride was great...it was windy, and the road was pretty clear. I spotted an eagle again! It had been quite long since I had last seen an eagle... but maybe they had been soaring around the sky, I just stopped noticing.

We didn't stop by at the lake area like we used to though, but we stopped at Ulu Yam Baru, a little town ... peaceful one... and guess who we found??

TADA!!! 

They were friendly! I gave them my doughnut and they loved it. :) Their eyes just looked so... mellow... haha! We met some friendly cats too... and at that time I just wished that I brought some cat food with me...

Dear went to the nearby food stall and got us Teh Ais (Ice Tea with Milk) and we drank it before making our way back using another Genting exit.

The Genting exit, which according to Dear is the second exit, and it was the best. THE BEST!!!!!! I have no idea how to explain the beauty of it, but the ride was just perfect. The wind was great, and since it was a pretty high place, the wind was a little colder than the normal wind that we have here in the city. There were very few cars on that road, and the mountains were beautiful, and surrounding us were nothing but trees... just a perfect ride, I would say. I was so glad he brought me there.

We then stopped by on the way down from Genting, just to look at the scenery... breathtakingly beautiful.

To be honest, Genting area still seems like a hidden story to me, even though the place has been commercialized... it's like what had been advertised are just certain areas, but behind the scene, there are some other stories that we had not known.

After stopping by for about 20 minutes, we went ahead to go back... and stopped by at Damansara Perdana to have our dinner.

The dinner was great. We discussed about getting a bigger bike, something that we had been discussing all along... so that we can fulfill our dreams on riding to Thailand or Vietnam... dear told me that one week leave is not enough. Two weeks will do...
I guess that can happen since we are only going to do that next year. I will try to save my leaves as much as I can...

Till next time.... I'm going to hug dear to sleep now. Good night.

Dear angels, please watch over my family in Kuching, and also my in laws...

Sad...

This is like the saddest thing that has happened to my gadget...

Snores

Dear is deafening me by snoring so hard next to my ear... I hope his hand doesn't feel numb because my head is dang heavy. I can feel it. Anyway, the night is still young... but he's snoring off. The snores sound like the old scooter trying to start in the morning. He's currently using his friend's scooter because his KTM is in the hospital. Or salon. Whatever. They are putting new frames on it... Anyway,  I'm going to doze off in a while... Oh and his snoring is due to his stubbornness …he fell asleep at 8 last night and did not wake up despite my waking him up. My fear was that he would wake up in the middle of the night and got sleepy in the morning. Well my fear came true. His snoring is very loud but I love him still. Ehehehe!

pre-redang

We are planning a trip to Redang Island. So far this is the most spoken of island by the people. I don’t know how nice it is, but even dear had said that it is the best so far. I guess I will need to be there to judge it firsthand.

This time around, our two housemates, the Korean sisters, will be going along with us. I know it’s about a month more to go, but I am all excited already. This is also going to be the first time we will be spending the nights with the Korean sisters, and I hope everything goes well and since I have this fear that freaky things will happen when the sun goes down, I do cross my finger and hope that there will be no one sleep-walking or getting possessed or anything. I know I do have this little plan on telling ghost stories together with them Korean girls in the night but I guess we should be doing that on the very last night we are there.

I have yet to really explore the pictures, and I have yet to apply my leave, but I believe I will do it as soon as we pay the down payment.

That is all for now, I will update this soon! 

Donkeys !

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem 

Last Sunday dear brought me to the Berjaya Hills Bukit Tinggi Animal Park. Dang, I love that place. I missed the donkeys. We had been there once, on a Sunday as well, last year... 18th November 2012 to be exact. We were still not married at the time... and this time we went as a married couple. He is my khalifah... ehehehe... I know this is not a cute matter but for some reason it sounds cute. 

Anyway, I have to be very honest that I do love Malaysia - regardless all the mixed emotions I have being in this country. I mean, yes, Malaysia is full of craps sometimes but tell me who is not? What is not? The journey there had been a little bit nauseating, because of all the twist and turns, but then the scenery was just perfect. A confession though - I think there was haze... 

My mind talks.

It has been months since I have written a new entry here. Let me see... 

Currently (Real Time Update): 

Dear is snoring away next to me. It's about 12.15 pm... And I have yet to hang the clothes. Chasing the sun is always good. 

I had taken a few chocolate biscuits, and have had a few sips of coffee. There's somehow always coffee in our room. Coffee here I mean Nescafe. The best brand ever. If there's a Nescafe brand for laptops or phone and they have that cocoa-istic smell on the items I would have bought them for sure. Not only Nescafe brings me to life, it brings everything else to life! I remember my favorite Aunt (Aunt Eng) loves it. I remember her sipping the coffee off bit by bit even though it was boiling hot. I didn't understand that back then. Now I do. 

Another real time update is this : 

It's now 3.35 pm, dear is awake, and I've prepared our late lunch, hung the clothes, and of course, played my Criminal Case on Facebook. 

I prepared my Fritto Misto which dear loves, and we ate it with our coffee. 

And it's raining. It's a cozy Sunday afternoon. With Big Bang Theory on the TV of course. And dear following up the Harlem Shake thing on his tab. Me typing away here in my pink laptop. I'm not sure about the necessity of this information though. 

Anyway, I'm going to categorize my writing here. 

On Family:

My sister Jaclyn had just changed her profile picture to the one which she was with me during my wedding day. I feel so honoured! My youngest baby sister Natalie is not feeling quite well, and she had been like this for days. I just hope she takes her medicine on time and drinks sufficient water. Water flushes off toxic from our body. 

I sometimes miss my grandpa before I go to sleep at night, and I miss my dad... and even though my grandma still looks healthy, I am really scared of the day when she says goodbye. I really, really am afraid of that day. I sometimes go to sleep crying because of all these. I miss them. I miss them real much. 

My mum has been dancing so much that dancing has become her world. I remember her telling us that dancing and performing has been her passion, even before she had us. Back when she was as young as ... super young. She should have become a star. 

My aunt has always been on my mind, and I really wish that she stops thinking that she is a burden to us because she's family and she should not feel that way. I love her like my own mum. I've got 5 angels in my life. 

First is my grandma, then my mum, aunt and then my  two sisters. They are my world. Of course when I say angel here I'm only referring to female. Dear is my ... life? Hahaha.. 

We haven't gone back to see my in-laws... I wonder how they are doing.... 

Last night we met them though at the cousin's ceremony. It was just a "Doa Selamat" thing. A "benediction"? Dear  had such a friendly cousin.

On Work: 

I am glad that I am at where I am. I do not want to promise anything, but I would say that I am glad that I am here. There are a few games to play, few comments to play in my head, and of course there a few wonders in my head, but, but, but ... I do respect these few people here in this organization that I am in, but I feel invisible intendedly at times. I of course, need to reflect on myself to check out what is wrong with me. The only thing that I am certain now is that I am glad to be where I am at and I know that there is still room for improvement... 

On Love: 

Oh my my, what can I say about this one? This one is definitely - something that I treasure. I treasure and will fight for. Well, dear has been nice. Not nice as in those Cinderella or Snow Whitey prince kind of nice, but he has been a good husband to me. Not a perfect one of course - but he is the perfect match for me. I dare to say this one here because I don't know how much darer I can be. I don't know what I am talking about any longer... being in love is a wonderful feeling. It drives you nuts, and it makes you unaware of so many things... 

1.) He does not bother me whenever I am doing my own stuffs.

2.) He waited for me at the gate when it rained, and came to me with an umbrella in hand. An umbrella which we both shared. 

3.) He finishes all the food that I cook, even though sometimes I forgot the most important ingredient ever- SALT.

4.) He takes the Vitamin C tablet that I bought for him - every morning. 

5.) He cleans up the dishes sometimes whenever I forget to do so. 

6.) Whenever there's pending house chore - and I get sleepy - he would say, "Sleep first, baby...we settle that another time..."

7.) He shows me interesting stuffs he finds in the internet... sharing IS caring... hahaha! 

8.) He asks me to drink coffee first - which we never really run out of in the room - whenever I wake up and he's awake. 

Okay I should stop here.

I love him. I love my husband. 

On Friends: 

I'm not sure if I will sound all fifteen or nine if I talk about my friendship with certain people here. 

Hmm... let's see.

So far, I'm more than thankful to have a bunch of friends who are really nice to me - and I make my effort in contacting them through Whatsapp, Skype, BBM... whatever that I can... I believe in constant communication even though sometimes people do get bored with all of these communication. 

I love 'em. They give me the laughter, the joy...

Chinese New Year 2013

Warning : Below context written in tears. Hehehe..

To all the racist people out there - and shallow minds of course - please equip yourself with more knowledge than ever to prepare yourselves for a better country. This comes because of some remarks saying that - never mind, I don't want to say a single thing about it here because it pisses me off.

So... I miss home, Kuching. I have in fact missed out 3 years of celebrations - the last time I celebrated Chinese New Year was back in 2010. Then again, before all these years, I had been celebrating this celebration since I was born. I miss my home town... I had been brought up like a Chinese - the only thing that differs me from a real, pure Chinese would be my name - because I carried Martin as my surname. Apart from that, all the superstitious were Chinese based. The hygiene came from there too. The loathe of slowness and laziness also from there - and I don't know, the whole family is from there? My pure Chinese mother and my 50% of Chinese father with the Chinese dominance had brought about all these. We are practically a Chinese family. 

From a Roman Catholic by religion, I had converted (reverted) to becoming a Muslim. This is not going to sound beautiful to many, but most people are somehow associating Muslim with Malay merely because of the country itself - no blaming here, I still love this country - don't throw me out of this country filled with memories. Well, in Malaysia, whoever is a Malay, is born a Muslim. That's how it works. Leaving Islam will cost you your nationality? I'm unsure, but I know it's nearly impossible to do so. Then again, who would want to leave Islam?? I'd like to be very honest here. Being a Muslim is not hard. It's beautiful. Covering up gives me a reason to remember Allah, to remember that a Muslim woman should cover up her awra'. And, people with shallow minds (sorry, whoever you are... as long as this crosses your mind) think that  I have become a Malay. How is that evolutionarily possible? I was born a Melanau Chinese and I will die as that itself. Growing up being in a totally different community, beliefs, and circle of friends, I don't know how I had accepted this change in me so willingly. Then again, all my other family and members - my only true friends and family members - who matter to me more than anything else at times - sometimes kind of put a dart through my heart - ACCIDENTALLY, I'd say. That hurts me more than ever, really. Then again, these are times I should be quiet because  at this kind of time, is the time when I cannot turn to anyone without making the other party hate the other. This is the real stress that I go through - yet never know who to tell it to, what to say about it... This is silence and I just don't know how to put all these into words so that my heart is clear. Converting to Islam belief does not make me a different race - it's the belief and the faith that I have that has been renewed and restored. That does not separate me from the rest of you, my own family and friends. Then again I'm used to being in the middle - my other Chinese friends take me as an outlier, my non-Chinese friends think of me as a Chinese. Throughout my whole life, there had been people initially thinking that I am a Chinese, and then when I mentioned my official (written in birth cert) race, they are like, "Oh..." and then start being careless when talking about Chinese race... and that's an Ouch. Being a Muslim and choosing Islam is my choice -MY CHOICE. One man wished me Happy Chinese New Year... even though I met him with my Hijab on...he knew me way before this - and I was..... happy. I was really happy that he did not judge what was on me. Sadly, (ARRGgghhhhh I'm in tears... I'm super homesick and I wanna go home - yet my family members do no think that I would want to celebrate this festive season. None of them has called me to wish me Happy Chinese New Year- the only person who had wished me is Jaclyn... ) some friends wish me half-heartedly... I don't know anymore. It just suddenly feels like I am all alone. Maybe people take this as a mode of betrayal - a form of betrayal? I don't feel included in anything. I was never really am the main character in anything. I seriously feel lonely in this. Sometimes the definition comes to you... without you needing to find it out. 

Last night I went up to Genting Highland with Dear... and even though he is my husband, I don't quite share this with him, because... It's ok, I told him that I'm homesick. I didn't know how else to say it. We used his KTM to go up there - and it was a great ride. It was a windy night - and it was super cold up there in Genting. I loved it up there. I was very excited about the trip even though it was a super short one. It had been a while since it was just the two of us going for trips. We brought home-made coffee... and can you imagine me falling asleep on the way back? I even dreamt of handing something to someone - I dreamt! We got out from the house at about 10:09 PM ... and we went to have some supper before heading home... the ride was great ... and I felt like I did not have enough of it. Then again, too much of something is bad enough - Spice Girls said.